She Wears a Smile

Caroline Graham Swann

Caroline Graham Swann

Darlings, last week my article was about a friend of mine who is an overwhelming inspiration for women. Her accomplishments for the needs of humanity are constant and her ability to understand with great compassion is most remarkable. She has raised over 8 million dollars for the education of the arts and charities that help the suffering with diseases of all types.

When one meets Yvonne Crum, one is instantly aware of her bright smile, showing beautiful deep dimples, and her designer attire. The best of the best, her presence is certainly one of great privilege and a very upscale life style. This beautiful woman seems to have it all: a world of society with high tea parties, glorious balls, luncheons, and association with VIPs from all over the world.

But, as Paul Harvey always said, “Now for the rest of the story.” The rest of the story about Yvonne Crum is the real tale of a woman who has triumphed over personal loss to give so much to so many.

As a child, Yvonne came home from school one day to an empty house. Her mother was gone. The little girl had been abandoned by her mother. She was alone in the world and had to depend on the mercy of human services to care for her. I can hardly imagine the shock and pain of this child, wondering why her mother abandoned her, and having to fit into a new scary world.

Yvonne made the best of her circumstances, and her strong character led to the determination to succeed in life without depending on others. She became a flight attendant, and her work ethic lead Yvonne to the Flight Attendant’s Hall of Fame.

Fate brought a treasured gift to her life, her husband Mayo Crum. This devoted couple have been married 45 years, and have two darling sons . These adorable boys were the most important part of their lives and, as the years passed, the boys turned into charming, handsome young men.

Paul, the oldest, was going to an event and on his way out the door he told his mom a casual “Bye! See you later,” as kids do. Yvonne, as mothers always do, said , “Paul, I love you.” Later that evening, their lives were forever shattered. Paul had been in a fatal accident. What in the world could be more painful than the loss of a child? My heart breaks for their loss. Yvonne always remembers Paul’s birthday, and her friends share the constant pain of Paul’s passing. We rally around her with support and love, but nothing can erase the sadness of such a tragedy.

Yvonne admits her vulnerability, which makes her even more dear to her friends. She has said, “I live with a broken heart.”

During a routine physical exam, Yvonne was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer, a fear all women understand, she went thought the fear, stress and trauma all breast cancer victims experience. She shares her struggle with going for continuing exams and admits her anxiety about the possibility of the dreadful cancer returning. Many cancer victims identify with her fears and feel a special connection due to her honesty.

She is also beset by a recurring fever that has, at times, made it difficult for her to work with the various charities she supports. The exact cause of the fever is undiagnosed but seems to be related to the chemotherapy for her breast cancer. Despite these afflictions, Yvonne still has great passion for many aspects of the human experience.

Beautiful clothes are a passion for Yvonne, which is something I can certainly understand. She has near perfect taste and I have never seen her look like less than a Vogue Cover. She is on the Dallas Best Dressed List and is a fashion icon. Yvonne shares that, due to their company’s closure some years ago, she shops the most elite designer resale boutiques, which means she saves thousands of dollars on her wardrobe. Who could not love this women for her lack of pretension? She does what she has to do with what life gives her, all without a backward glance.

Dolly Parton’s “Coat of Many Colors” is a favorite song for Yvonne. I often wonder if she identifies with this song due to her childhood. It brings tears to my eyes. Through all of her challenges and pain, she has never lost her concern for others. Yvonne reminds me of Kipling’s poem, “IF.” A creed in poem form that is about strong character, she is an example of the traits about which Kipling so beautifully wrote. She wears a smile on her face, even while facing hardships that would cripple many people.

She wears a smile on her face. What an inspiration for all women.