Round Peg Round Hole

Really 300xIn case you hadn’t noticed, sometimes life makes me say, “Really?”  It happened again this past week, and I was left shaking my head, wondering if perhaps I had slipped into the Twilight Zone.  It started with a garbage container at a barbecue fast food restaurant.  Thought had apparently been put into making this container.  Now I have to emphasize the word ‘apparently’ because in reality, this was the dumbest thing I’ve seen in a while.  Keep in mind I’ve seen some really dumb things.  I work around teenagers.  To say that I’ve seen more than my share of dumb things would be a massive understatement.

So, there I am about to throw away my round plate in the round opening of the garbage unit only to discover the opening has a smaller diameter than the plate.  Really?  Let’s build a three foot door for an elephant or try to drive a car through an open window while we’re at it.  It’s Euclidian geometry, people!  Math is important and somebody is gonna waste several minutes of their life trying different angles of that plate because they didn’t pay attention in math class.  As for me, I paid attention in class, so I crushed the plate and scoffed at the entire circumstance.  I’m convinced life throws these things at me so I’ll seriously consider the possibility I’m on a hidden camera reality show.

Then a few minutes later, when I’d just about decided there wasn’t some bizarre TV program centered around my reaction to random oddity and stupidity, I looked out the window of my car as I drove through town.  I did not see a goat dressed like the Queen of England singing ‘Lola, she was a showgirl,’ but I might as well have.  What I did see confused me as much as that song in the seventies that said, ‘Sky rockets in flight, afternoon delight.’  Why would anybody shoot fireworks in the middle of the day?  I found it bizarre, and a waste of a good Roman candle.  I was confused, but I was a kid.  Looking out my window at a boxing ring on the side of the road with boxers in pink trunks brought back that same confusion.  Really?  Either somebody is trying to mess with me or the world has a very poor grasp of geometry and is even more bizarre than I ever imagined.  Then again, I can imagine the boxers in pink were goats, so I guess I lose all standing to scoff indignantly.

Source: David Swann